Magic Jewball

I don’t usually watch the Grammys but I did tonight. Well, I do often watch bits of it via DVR but this evening I actually sat through the whole thing. And survived. This is because of the folks in this photo, The Police. The Police were the first group I ever idolized but I was too young to ever see them in concert. And so, I will probably be one of those people spending insane amounts of money to see them on their soon-to-be-announced tour. In the meantime, I watched them for free on my teevee. Let’s just say, they no longer look exactly like this photo.

And now some random observations….

The only thing worse than Justin Timberlake is self-produced minicam shots of Justin’s face. They didn’t really bring sexy back on my TV.

OK, Mary J, your life used to be crap and now Jesus and your man turned it around. We get it.

Despite the fact that I’m not a Dixie Chicks fan, I was surprised that they forgot the most important line of their speech, “Oh yeah, and clearly we were right. Suck on that.”

“My Humps” is, in fact, the Best Pop Performance By A Duo Or Group, you are not dreaming. Why, God, why?

Both Tool and Nine Inch Nails were beat out for Best Hard Rock performance by Wolfmother. Are you freaking kidding me?

Somewhere in the middle some awful, awful people (don’t make me list them) were chosen to do do a series of Eagles covers. Gah. But the other scary thing is that almost all of the Eagles songs in that medley now just remind me of the pop culture ephemera to which they are now attached. “Desperado” of course reminds me of Seinfeld and “Life In the Fast Lane” takes me right back to the big dance scene in “Fast Times at Ridgemont High.”

No disrespect to the genius which was Ahmet Ertegun, but James Blunt dedicated “You’re Beautiful” to this guy?

And PS, I still think this guy and his song blow. James, not Ahmet.

How did Justin Timberlake get three songs when The Police only got one? Is there no justice in the world?

How did Corinne Bailey Rae win nothing? First I had to sit through her performing with John Legend and John Mayer and now this? Boo, hiss.

Hm, I think I’d better check off “Rants” as the category here. Becca’s getting upset!

Why was the Red Hot Chili peppers performance supposed to be the one we’re talking about? Was it the confetti? Ooooh, confetti!

Gosh, do you think the members of the Academy were saying something about the current administration with all those Dixie Chicks awards? Hmmmm…..

Well, so ends music’s biggest night. And let me just cut to the chase and say not enough of my label’s artists performed in a killer manner or won important awards, thus ensuring yet another poor week of sales. You see, I could have forgiven the whole “only one Police song” thing if only I could have made some money out of all this.

I wish this were my blog’s theme song.
The Police – Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic