A polar bear is a mammle
You know what’s disheartening? Putting together a new resume and trying to find maybe three bullet points out of your previously long and rich descriptives that can possibly be tweaked to impress someone in your new field. Ouch.
However, I did have this experience with a third grader today. She was doing a Powerpoint (remember how everything I hated about my old job was symbolized by smarmy Powerpoint decks I had to put together? Yeah, now I teach little kids how to use PP. Hello, irony!) about polar bears and the question her slide was supposed to answer was, “what are some related animals to your animal?” Her answer (in all caps, but I won’t duplicate that) was:
Polar bears have mothers and fathers and kids and aunts and uncles and cousins who are related to them, just like people.
Then I had to break it to her gently that she had misunderstood the question. She insisted that’s what Wikipedia had said. Yeah. Someone hire me to have experiences like that every day. Please.
Title comes from another slide. In my head I pronounced it Ma’am-lay.
It is expecting quite a lot from a third grader to know the names of the polar bear’s family members. Probably even the polar bear just assumes that old bears who give them sloppy kisses and marvel that they aren’t little cubs anymore are aunts and uncles or something.
I bet their uncles and aunts and cousins never come over for brisket and rugelach. I hear they are very selfish with their fresh meat.
I’ll need all that information in a PowerPoint, thanks. Also, I’m posting this comment from a plane at 35,000 feet, so I’ll be interested to see if it goes through.