Magic Jewball

all signs point to no


You will be dead in October!

Filed under : Baseball,Sports
On April 11, 2011
At 11:30 am
Comments : 5

Despite the sad, sad weekend the Yankees had, I still laughed and laughed at this commercial when I saw it last night. And as a bonus, I didn’t even have to sit through most of the rubber game, as I took a three hour standardized exam, came home, ate dinner, and promptly fell asleep for four hours. Apparently, so did CC Sabathia. Rimshot!

Anyhow, I realized why I haven’t been doing any cooking these last few months and it’s not because I don’t have time, although I don’t, it’s because there was no baseball to listen to in the kitchen. This week, I made a fantastic flounder while John Sterling was making an awful home run call for Russell Martin (“Monsieur Martin est là,” really?). By the way, here was one of the questions on my exam:

If you don’t know what job you’ll have and whether you’ll be sitting at a desk or moving around or how long your day will last, or even if you may be at home living off your 401k, is it best to buy Gameday Audio for:
a. Your phone
b. Your computer
c. Your iPad
d. Your iPod
e. None, you need that money for ramen noodles

Ha, no, actually, most of the exam was based on things I seem to have known all my life, like what a database is for and what’s the best solution for sending out the same memo to many different people (if you said Mail Merge, hopefully we both passed). There were more complicated questions, I will admit, but none as hard as the fake one I posted just above. For the record, I chose iPod, since that will be the most convenient to listen to whilst in transit, which is when I am most likely to need to hear a game. Also, because my phone battery dies in about twelve hours as is; in active use it will never make it through your typical five hour Yankees-Red Sox affair. E was a trick answer: how could I make noodles without baseball to listen to?


5 Comments for this post

  1. tami says:

    When I read posts like this, I feel just awful. I can’t connect with you on any level when it comes to baseball. So, for that reason, this season, I will commit to watching two games. I just don’t know who to watch. Tell me.

    Wait, wait! I just remembered that I have been to four professional games: two in San Diego, one in LA, and one in San Diego. I believe it was the Marlins, Padres, Angels, Giants, and others too. 🙂

    See, maybe I DO have some background in baseball. Mostly I just remember the awesome garlic fries at the Giant’s game!

  2. sarpon says:

    One of the first conversations you and I had contained several of these exchanges, almost verbatim, with me in the John Krasinski role and you as Alec Baldwin, except that I said rooting for the Yankees was like rooting for IBM and you said that you father worked for IBM and I think from there we went on to argue U-Bet versus Bosco.

    Anyway, you still have the Orioles.

  3. Becca says:

    Tam, I know this will be a totally radical notion, but it is OK to only relate to some things on this blog. We are all snowflakes! Except for twins.

    That said, I did not always love baseball – I know, crazy! – but committed to it in a similar way. I always liked the Yankees and went to games as a child and sometimes as an adult. But I didn’t really love baseball as a sport until a co-worker derided me for only paying attention once the playoffs had started (this was in the early 2000’s). I realized he was right and the next season I watched every regular season game except a couple. Really! And that’s when I fell in love.

    Sarp, I stand by my remarks about IBM and had that very conversation frequently (about IBM, not baseball) with College Boyfriend who did his thesis on why IBM needed to be broken up.

    Anyway, sorry your team was not mentioned in the commercial but feel free to re-read my award-winning essay, Sweet Jesus, Why Would Anyone Be a Mets Fan?

  4. Elena says:

    Great commercial. The Yankees may have had a slow start–the Cardinals are much worse. But neither is as bad as the Red Sox. If only the Orioles could hang in there all season…
    Listening to baseball on the radio [and TV] really does lend itself to cooking. And sewing. I made my niece a wedding dress last weekend. Pretty much finished the whole thing during the Yanks-Sox game [not really, but I could have].

  5. Becca says:

    I would really like the Orioles to do well all season. I’d love to see them get the wild card.

    Nice job on the dress! Personally, I finished War & Peace during the Yankees-Red Sox game. Not really, but I could have.

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