Lost in transcription
Google, what can’t it do? I have Google Voice, which used to be called Grand Central, and rings all my phones at once. That way, people don’t call me on my cellphone, which has about 60 minutes a month, when I’m sitting right next to a landline. Also, I can tailor my voicemail message to different numbers so if you know me as Becca, you get “you’ve reached Becca” and if you know me as something else, you get “you’ve reached something else.”
It also has a fantastic service which transcribes voicemails so you don’t have to dial in and listen to several minutes of, “just calling to say hi, but also, did you get Barb a present for her birthday? I was thinking of something I saw on Amazon. You know what? I’ll just e-mail you a link. So, um, yeah… yeah, I’ll just e-mail you. Later! Oh, right, this is Sam. Did I say my phone number? You probably have it… well, I’ll just e-mail.”
Hell, Barb’s already had two more birthdays since I started listening to that. But Google transcribes them so you don’t have to go through all that plus the whole, “press 7 to delete, press 2 to explode your brain” rigmarole. It’s just like an e-mail! Except when they’re not so good at it. While I was in Baltimore, I finally met up with our second Reader of the Month, Steph! She was delayed a bit and called me to let me know that she and Mr. Steph were on their way. Why, it was clear from the transcription!
So, to sum up, Steph and her husband couldn’t make it to the restaurant at Harborplace on time because they were doing it in the parking garage. Also, someone was watching, so that made it extra special! I made sure to let Warren, whoever the hell he is, know.
My very first Google Voice voicemail transcription translated a man’s phrase “I’m sorry for bugging you” as “I’m sorry I love you.” No joke. And it was a man who was not surprisingly bugging me, but would have been very inappropriately loving me.
Awkward.
HAHAHAHAHAHA! Mr. Steph and I are old married floks. Ya just have to do it when you can!
Warren
Jane, yes, but there are no commas, that’s the trouble. Was he sorry that he loved you or was it “I’m sorry, I love you?”
If, you know, he had actually loved you rather than bugged you.
Speaking of, Steph, I read it all wrong! YOU are Warren! I thought it was “Hey Warren, here we’re gonna do it in the parking garage” when it’s really “Hey, Warren here, we’re gonna do it in the parking garage.”
That clears so much up.
I must sign up for this service. My messages will be so much more interesting.
Watching ever do,
sarpon
Or, you could just befriend people who do it in parking garages.