Don’t leave me hanging on the telephone
It’s been a busy week and I’ve been to both the doctor AND the dentist so you know it was another period of pain and Vicodin. But never mind that. While I was in the waiting room of the doctor’s office (and I mostly get the last appointment of the day because I work late so things are usually pretty empty), I listened to two kids making prank phone calls with the older kid’s cell phone. It was a tween girl and maybe a ten-year-old boy and the boy did the talking while the girl clasped her hand over her mouth to stifle uproarious laughter. In a thick Bronx accent, he would say, “Hello, I’m calling from Bank of Amerikuh and yo loan is expiuhed. Hello? Hello?” He seemed genuinely surprised each time someone hung up on him, which everyone did within three seconds. And then it hit me why kids’ prank phone calls fail. Because kids sound like kids! This may seem entirely obvious to you but it did not to me when I was an adolescent. I mean, say he had said, “Good evening, sir, I am calling from Bank of America regarding your loan, there is a problem,” it still would have come out in the voice of a ten-year-old. Click.
The other thing that struck me is, “your loan has expiuhed” has become the new “I have your sister locked up in my car.” Because these days, that’s a lot more terrifying and realistic. Even the youts know.
Title comes from:
Blondie – Hanging On The Telephone
Today, listening to the new Depeche Mode album on my iPod, I started to meditate (it was hard to meditate, there were two women kissing in front of me, but this is the subway) on all the other “first days” of DM albums. Let’s take a look back, shall we?
