Magic Jewball

all signs point to no


Uptown Girl

Filed under : Judaism,New York City
On May 31, 2006
At 1:26 pm
Comments : 23

You may remember my description of Fifth Avenue, playground of Ladies Who Lunch and now, tech geeks. But there is another Fifth, as seen below.

Yes, this is Fifth, slightly further uptown in Harlem. Why do I bring this up? No reason, except I was there to catch a train yesterday and while I waited for this light to change, I couldn’t help thinking that this isn’t really what people think when they imagine Fifth. I don’t think Holly Golightly ever came up here. Or maybe she did. I never actually saw Breakfast At Tiffany’s although I did see the Seinfeld episode about it. Does that count?

Anyway, let’s pretend you don’t know where Harlem is (90% of you probably don’t and that’s OK; I don’t know where Wal-Mart is in your town). Ponder this math problem. Timmy lives in the 90’s and needs to go UP. Should he catch the train at 42nd or at 125th? I’ll wait for you to think about that.

The funny thing is, most people go all the way down to 42nd in order to then go back up to 125th and beyond. But, you see, 125th is in Harlem and people are afraid. Even royalty was once carjacked on 125th. Well, Queen Latifah is royalty, right? But I often take the train from there if I have no luggage (there’s a bit of a walk between the subway and the train station). It’s not that I’m so brave but it saves me ten minutes. Come ON. I need my ten minutes. Plus, 125th Street is really not that bad, despite what you’ve heard. Harlem has a rich history and not just of scaring the bejesus out of people who live further downtown.

This is the view most people get of 125th.

Not too close and with a Metro-North window safely shielding you. But clearly, I was OK enough to pull out my camera here. Of course I did. I was hoping to see Queen Latifah getting relieved of her car.

U2 – Angel Of Harlem
Queen Latifah – U.N.I.T.Y.

You didn’t really think I was going to link to Uptown Girl, did you?

So this weekend is another Jewish holiday. But Passover was just seven weeks ago! Yes, this is Shavuot (Shah-voo-oat) which literally means “weeks” because it falls seven weeks after Passover. On Passover we celebrate the exodus from Egypt. Seven weeks later, we celebrate the giving of the Torah to the Jewish people in the desert. The period between the two is called the Omer (see Leviticus 23:15 for more!). Before Casey Kasem, the Jews were counting down (or up, really) the days between the two fun holidays. But how can I remember what day it is so I can count it? Simple, I use the hOmer Simpson Calendar!

The tradition is to study Torah all night. My tradition is to go to sleep early and dream about blintzes. The reason we eat blintzes is because it is traditional to eat dairy foods. The dairy foods come into the picture because before the Torah, which we only got a few thousand years ago (give or take), we didn’t know the Kosher rules for meat. Because of this, we stick with cheesy goodness. So grab your Lactaid and party J-style!

“But Becca, will there be no new posts this Friday/Saturday? What will we do between cleaning out our sock drawers and watching the grass grow?”

Simple! The delightful Culotte Folle has helpfully agreed to be guest blogger on Friday and I have scheduled her post to appear then. In return, if I can get my act together, I may just get to guest-post to her blog next week! And joy was spread throughout the Blogosphere.

Garbage – Milk


23 Comments for this post

  1. Jane says:

    I’m boycotting your blog unless Culotte posts a picture of her bum.

  2. RNerd says:

    Yes Seinfield counts.
    Yes Queen Latifah is royalty. To whom is subjective.
    I love blintzes. Could you throw couple in with the chili?

    I didn’t know the Simpson’s were Jewish.

  3. Becca says:

    Well thank goodness someone is finally answering my questions. But blintzes don’t go well with chili. Moses says.

    Jane, no picture was included, I am sorry to say.

  4. steph says:

    “So grab your Lactaid and party J-style!” That’s one of my favoritest sentences ever written.

    Sometimes I wish I was more religious so that I could say things like “So grab that wafer and wine and party Episcopalean style!”

    Happy Shavuot! Or is it Merry Shavuot? I always get them confused.

  5. Culotte says:

    I’m just jealous that there is an actually holiday that encourages– no, requires the consumption of cheese.

    But I’m guest blogger, so nanny nanny boo boo.

  6. steph says:

    See, if they would serve a nice Smoked Gouda or Fontina instead of the little wafer, I’d be a lot more diligent in my church attendance.

  7. Becca says:

    We enjoy, “have a cheesy Shavuot, my Jewish brutha.”

    You know, or, “happy holiday.”

  8. Twenchie says:

    Go ahead, eat your cheesy blintzes, I shall be breakfasting with Grinchie on Saturday morning. So there!

  9. RNerd says:

    Not mixing the blintzes with the chili silly!

    You did say you were sending me some of your veggie chili right?

  10. Anonymous says:

    Great pictures and thank you for the tour.

    I didn’t know cranky had a blog!

    Libby aka Merlie

  11. MonkeyGirl says:

    I love online interacting. I hate online reading. So I printed your whole blog. Like two inches of it. And I read it all, through May 23, on the bus or in bed, and I’ll read the rest today and I deserve a prize. I hope that you can provide a prize better than the surprise third attempt at The Root Canal from Hell which, should I shake you hard enough, you’d likely predict as a part of my imminent future. Yeah, my comment got bloggy, but this is a blog. Great blog. I’ve commented before, but I guess you have something against me because none of my comments posted. And they were even nice. Tsk.

  12. monkeygirl says:

    Hey, why am I “in” now? I didn’t even have to type faux-words in boxes, which totally stresses me out.

  13. Becca says:

    Dear MonkeyGirl-

    Are you related to MonkeySwirl? Anyway, I turned off all the security because approving everyone’s comments was too much work. A girl needs to sleep sometimes.

    I had no idea I had two inches of posts. Go me! But if you will re-print out “Ownership Will Tear Us Apart Again,” you will see one of your comments.

    No prizes but feel free to blog on my blog anytime. Sorry about the root canal. Poor MonkeyTeeth.

  14. Becca says:

    Oh, and this is for everyone:

    Please note, many of my readers come from another website. They sometimes make themselves quite at home here (and I’m glad and love them dearly).

    But they should all know that this is not, in fact, that site, and many readers will not get their jokes. Then my real friends will pester me and well, it gets messy. So let’s leave that site on that site and let the Jewball be all independent. Grassy ass!

  15. Culotte says:

    What happened to my comment?

  16. Becca says:

    What? Your comment is up there.

    Now you’re just playing with my mind.

  17. MonkeySwirlGirl says:

    Well, at least my root canal prize is confirmed for 3:15 p.m. Prayers for my community.

  18. Becca says:

    Well at least you’re not here where 3:15 comes three hours earlier.

    But my thoughts and prayers go out to you and your entire dental community.

  19. Culotte says:

    No, I posted back to Libby, explaining that Culotte is Cranky’s prettier, french alter ego.

  20. Becca says:


    Then you forgot to say “Abracadabra a la peanut butter sandwiches.”

  21. Jannikins says:

    You’re going to be out of the office tomorrow?

    Why was I not given better warning about this?

  22. Becca says:

    You really need to be a more avid J-Ball reader, Jan.

  23. Culotte says:

    It’s ok, Jan! I’m taking over! *rubbing my chubby little hands together*

Comments are closed.