Magic Jewball

In my time providing password hints to the million+ websites which require you to have one, I have shared many bits of info about my life: street I grew up on, mother’s maiden name, favorite movie, first job, first pet’s name (I did have a goldfish, you know), etc. And there are many I have seen that I chose not to utilize: first car, spouse’s whatever, etc. But never in my life have I seen this idea… at least, not until Irish Rail.

Not to stereotype. *cough*

Anyway, here’s a happy song from a Northern Ireland native. Tomorrow, last day of Project Happy Thoughts and (groggy) arrival in another land. And then another land. And then a third land.

By the way, regarding the title, the fog was here. Crazy. But I hear they have some over there, too.

This is one of my many posts written on a train. We’re somewhere between Aberdeen (got something to prove? Oh ahahaha, I slay me) and Wilmington and I feel like I should write this now and fall asleep at a decent hour in preparation to have to start going to bed and getting up 4 hours earlier (the rest of the world isn’t on DST yet, luckily). I am quite sure that my dinner of donuts and sweet tea will help me achieve this goal.

Anyway! It was another lovely day in paradise, albeit a bit weird and disconcerting as my alma mater continues to change and add things so as to completely destroy the alumni experience. At one point, North and I stumbled on an entirely new quad and set of buildings, all exactly in the style of the old buildings. It felt like those dreams you have where you are looking for something in the back of your closet and suddenly find a trap door with an entire other apartment on the other side. We had to sit down several times.

There are so many new and great things every time I come to campus that it begins to rankle you, how different your experience might have been with zipcar stands, free shuttles everywhere, new housing, new shops, a coffee bar in every building, a complete building devoted to Jewish life, an archeological museum, etc. My friends, these are not happy thoughts.

My happy thought, instead, is this: it is better to be older and wiser. It just is. You get to reframe your previous experiences and are better able to handle the difficult new ones.

The title of this post comes from a construction worker who asked us this just a few moments after we got on campus. It was next to the building that Jesse Eisenberg walked out of in The Social Network because it was supposed to look like it could be Harvard. I also took several classes there. One was a sociology class with North where I wrote fiction throughout each session and North would read it, hot off the presses. One was a history class with College Boyfriend after we had broken up where I was thus hugely conscious of his presence every moment. One was an Adult Ed class on office software where I learned WordPerfect, Lotus123, and dBase, all for DOS.

I suppose we looked lost. We were walking slowly and dazedly. We looked confused and perhaps nauseous. We were older than the students and anyway, it is Spring Break so there weren’t any. But the question stunned me. I said, without the slightest hesitation, “no, not at all.” But you know, I was back then. The good news is, when you gain age and life perspective, you can find yourself.

Ladies and gentlemen, Wilmington, Delaware will be next. Please check around you for your belongings and personal items. Wilmington. Wilmington, Delaware.

The Cure – Lost

I’m here in beautiful Baltimore, chock full of dinner and feeling the kind of tired you feel when you’ve done a lot of walking. I’m on vacation, the weather is fabulous, and I’m back in a city I love after three years. There isn’t a lot NOT to be happy about today.

I’ve talked some about how I used to be in debt, the kind of credit card debt that makes your stomach hurt when you think about it…if you ever do. Part of this was because I worked in shopping malls for a long time and there was always a sale of which I had to take advantage. I rarely shop for clothes anymore, except online. Sometimes I go to the Gap and find there is not one thing I want. That’s also a function of growing older plus the horrid selection they seem to have nowadays, I must admit. Today I went back to the Gallery at the Inner Harbor and suddenly, there were a million things I wanted at the Gap! I went into the dressing room with ten garments, I kid you not. I only bought two, though. Then I went to Anne Taylor Loft and bought some more. Folks, I have figured it out. It’s.just.this.mall.

Cashing out at Anne Taylor, I made some comment to North about how we needed to eat after our busy shopping morning. Then I looked at the cashier who was passing me back my credit card and she smiled politely. And then I remembered. What it felt like to work at that very mall, trapped within the four walls of your store and unable to leave, standing for hours, waiting for your 30 minutes off in a long day so that you could eat. And then people would come in all day who were at their most leisurely moments and complain that shopping just wore them out. “Let’s go eat!” they’d say and walk away through the doorway that confined you. So I said, “I used to work in this mall. At that store that’s now A Dollar. It was a record store.” She smiled politely again. OK, Grandma.

So much for that. But my happy thought is this: everyone, even this woman, gets to go on vacation some time. And then your time is your own. As I said yesterday, it’s nice to be happy in your job. But your own time is the awesomest of all.

Title comes from:
Culture Club – Time (Clock of the Heart)

A very quick one, as I’m leaving tomorrow morning from Baltimore and hopefully I’ll have some happy thoughts to share with you from there.

This one’s about my job, which I love more than I could really articulate on this blog, but seldom have any time to write about. I think a massive career change, new job, and first year teaching could each in and of itself form a wonderful subject to explore via this medium. Sadly, I barely have time to return emails, much less give any of these the thoughtfulness and introspection they deserve. Suffice to say, I am thankful every day for the opportunity I’ve been given and the luck to find a good fit – that one’s even harder to come by.

This is all to say that earlier this month I was offered a new contract and last week I happily signed it and turned it in to HR. I feel extraordinarily fortunate to know that the school appreciates me as much as I find joy and purpose within their walls.

As an aside, I was never signed to a contract in any of my jobs in the music industry. To know for sure that you’ll have a job for the next 18 months and what your salary will be in six months’ time is breathtaking in its extravagance, to me. I hope I never lose that feeling of gratitude and I hope everyone can know that feeling: to love what you do, feel that it matters, and be supported in your work. It makes you very appreciative and thankful. And happy.

I had to put off my Friday delayed post for this. Really, timely news keeps interrupting my flow; it’s not my fault! I just discovered that yesterday was the 50th birthday of one of my favorite actress/singers of the 80′s, Clare Grogan of Altered Images and various Bill Forsyth movies.

I have learned through hard experience to not say things like, “OMG, you will LOVE Gregory’s Girl!” Because it seems to be one of those things like cilantro that some people love and others are more, “you eat what now?” But I love cilantro and I love Gregory’s Girl (that’s Clare in Gregory’s Girl to the left there), which I still quote fairly often to this day. And I love Clare Grogan who was quirky and poppy and awesome.

BTW, she is still acting and I think singing, but I admit to not having seen/heard anything of hers in a while. I think this video is probably from when she was more like 20.

Altered Images also had a song called Happy Birthday which you may remember from the movie Sixteen Candles and that might seem more appropriate to this post. But I prefer this song, not only because I like it better, but because it perfectly encapsulates the theme of the month. I might not be happy… but I could be!