Magic Jewball

all signs point to no


Speaking of large sums of money…

Filed under : TV
On February 25, 2009
At 10:00 pm
Comments : 4

It’s video week at J-Ball! This commercial is all over New York TV and cracks my shit up every time. Is it the way each word is the most hilarious word in English ever? The jaded “pudding” lady? The eager South Asian guy? The fierce kumquat woman? The teacher who looks like every English teacher I ever had? Who knows! All I can say is, this is the way I will say monkey in my mind for a long time.

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Brother, can you spare $990,000?

Filed under : Life in general
On February 23, 2009
At 9:30 pm
Comments : 2

Hey, I have nothing to say! It happens sometimes. In the meantime, please enjoy this instructional video whereby I learned why my 401k has $5 in it.

In case you weren’t sure before, we’re all screwed!


It wasn’t me, it was the one-armed cousin

Filed under : Baseball
On February 18, 2009
At 1:15 am
Comments : 13

I’m a little high on Vicodin at the moment so bear with me.

You’ll laugh at that intro if you saw the A-Rod press conference today. I only saw the first bit and could barely hear even that as I was in the waiting room of my endodontist and the sound was turned way down on the fancee HDTV. But I did hear the first sentence and I was relieved that I did. See, when I was a kid, I never did homework. Never. God knows how I made it out of any grade. So when there was the sort of assignment that involved the teacher calling on you (“Becca, could you come up front and do your oral report?”) I’d get horrifically nervous, knowing that I’d have to say in front of my teacher and the entire class, “uh, sorry, I didn’t do my homework.” That never made me do the prep work the next time, though. I was young and stupid! My cousin in the Dominican told me it was harmless!


Today, (well, yesterday, but the Vikes made me fall asleep at 7 so now I’m awake watching Ace of Cakes on the Food Network) I had a root canal, my first ever, and I was super-nervous. It was at 1:30, coincidentally the same time as A-Rod’s press conference. And then I realized that at this very moment in time, I would rather be me than a multi-million dollar earning, fun baseball playing superstar. Because I’d prefer getting six painful shots and a vibrating drill stuck in my mouth over standing up in front of authority figures, my peers, and the whole world seemingly and having to say, “uh, I did the wrong thing and I have no real explanation – oops!” And if I was afraid that someone as public and savvy as A-Rod might not be as nervous as I would be, he started off by saying, “first, bear with me. I’m a little nervous or a lot nervous, so bear with me a little bit.” Awesome! The root canal was nowhere near as bad and that made me feel better.

PS, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: A-Rod is not a real Yankee and it has nothing to do with steroids. Thanks for understanding.

Howard Jones – No One Is To Blame


iPod song of the week – further nostalgia

Filed under : iPod Song of the Week
On February 15, 2009
At 9:30 pm
Comments : 3

The video I posted the other day reminded me how great a band 10,000 Maniacs was and more importantly, how I’m always looking for a band I’ve never done an iPod Song of the Week on. The song in the video, Peace Train, isn’t my favorite Maniacs song, and as a matter of fact, isn’t even my favorite Cat Stevens song.

I mean, all their songs are great based on the folkiness and the melodies and Natalie Merchant’s fantabulous voice (they didn’t seem to survive too well after she left, let’s be frank). But like many songs from long ago that are your favorites, this one will stick with me forever because of a break-up. You know how you have a mental mix-tape of those tracks that nursed you through that horrible, horrible time? This one would be way up there. It’s really about an alcoholic but works just as well as a plea to someone trying to break up with you. I really can’t hear it in any other context, even though it’s the soundtrack to the break up of a relationship that started twenty years ago today. Really. Because I’m good with dates that way. The calendar kind, not the other kind. Obviously.

Anyway! It’s still a great song, full of minor-chord angst, the trademark wiry guitar sound, and of course, the luscious vocals.

(Sorry, only 30 seconds)
10,000 Maniacs – Don’t Talk

Streaming audio available on the iPod Song of the Week page.


Enjoy the special day!

Filed under : Baseball
On February 13, 2009
At 11:00 am
Comments : 5

Pitchers & Catchers reporting, that is.

Every year, I fall in love all over. And then get my heart stomped on. Admittedly, less often than the rest of you, but still. Not this year. I’m sure of it.

This is always the best part of the relationship – all that potential!

Love. Exciting and new.

:: sigh ::

Or whatever they’re calling it now.

Theme From The Love Boat