Magic Jewball

all signs point to no

 

iPod song of the week - NIN

Filed under : iPod Song of the Week
On April 8, 2007
At 4:30 pm
Comments : 6

And now back to our regular iPod song of the week schedule.

Hey, let’s all get ready for the new Nine Inch Nails CD! It’s been leaked all over the Internets and so far I’m really digging it. But getting pysched up for the new CD always makes me start re-listening to the old stuff by said artist. I think this was one of the singles from the last album but I’m not sure. Who cares, it’s genius.

The song could really be titled “How the fuck could I be so stupid and how did I let this happen to myself?” Or maybe, “It’s not you, it’s me, because I’m an idiot.” But I guess “Only” was catchier. I don’t think anyone’s manner of singing ever went with lyrics the way Trent Reznor’s blasè, bored yet bitterly sarcastic tone works with this song’s. And of course once we get to the chorus you get the full-on angry blast o’Trent. I’ve included the lyrics (I transcribed them nearly from memory!) but you can’t get what they really mean unless you actually hear him voice them. Plus there’s the fun of hearing him echo a line from “Down In It” in the second verse.

If you are someone who knows me in the unpixelated form and wonder if it’s purely a coinkidink that this post is twinned with the one above, why, I have no idea what you mean. *cough*



Nine Inch Nails - Only

Lyrics

 
 

Play ball!

Filed under : Baseball, Tennis, Sports
On April 6, 2007
At 4:15 am
Comments : 9

It’s 4 in the morning and you all know what that means: posting in the middle of the night! Who needs quality, I’m awake so let’s go for it. Hey, how often do you get to hear that?

Anyway, it’s been a while since I’ve talked sports but there’s a convergence of fun events so here we go.

Baseball season is here! I think it’s finally time to cancel my Netflix subscription as I’ve had the same DVD since February and now with the six game a week schedule I can see I’ll never get to it. Fortunately, I’m 30 yards from a Blockbuster. Anyway, Andy Pettitte is back! And he blew chunks! I’m going to give him more time, though. Cory Lidle, however, is still dead.

Hockey playoff season is coming! And the Rangers made the playoffs! I know, only like two teams don’t make the playoffs but one of them, until a really short time ago, was going to be the Rangers. But they clinched last night (I guess it’s officially last night now) and I’m just thrilled. Definitely must cancel Netflix.

Davis Cup tennis is back! Again! I seriously can’t get the schedule of this thing but I think it’s this weekend and you know what that means: I found David Nalbandian! But even more exciting, should this be your home team, is that Israel is actually in it (they’re playing Italy - lucky Italy). I know, they have less chance of going all the way than Cory Lidle does of pitching but I’m proud anyway. Kadima!

Team Argentina: That’s David, just to the left of the Incredible Hulk.




Here’s the only picture the Davis Cup site provided of the Israeli team. Ooooh, aaaaah.



Oh, and the US is playing Spain. That’s all you’ll get if you’re watching American TV. What, there are other countries?



Local H - Sports Bar

 
 

Sweet mysteries of life

Filed under : Etc.
On April 5, 2007
At 3:35 pm
Comments : 4

After being away for a few days I have some pressing questions:

1. Will the person who searched on “can you eat fruity pebbles on passover?” actually find the answer on this page?

2. Why on earth is there a Joy Division sneaker? Did Ian Curtis appear to be the sort of guy who would have shilled for New Balance?

3. When KP said she would go to any concert with me did she know I’d call her bluff on this one?

4. Does anyone know where David Nalbandian is this week? Because I really tried but I just can’t find him.

5. What was the “mustard” in the honey-mustard chicken that I had for lunch from the Kosher shop since mustard isn’t Kosher for Passover?

6. Did you think I only sat back and accepted comments? Wait, I’ll answer this one.

7. When will Peter Braunstein just go for it and off himself? It’s really getting tiresome.

8. Was that actual snow this morning?

In honor of Passover, I’ll just cut this off at eight. You’re welcome!



Jack Johnson - Questions

 
 

Bienvenue and thanks for stealing my picture

Filed under : Life in general
On April 2, 2007
At 1:25 pm
Comments : 11

I’m a bit of an Internet vigilante. When someone hotlinks to a picture from my site, I go have a look at who it is and why they stole my picture and what it’s being used for. Mostly, I don’t really care about the theft itself (half these pictures aren’t even mine, especially all the Simpsons ones) but I do care that you’re stealing my bandwidth. For you non-bloggers, I should explain that every picture you look at travels over the Internets to your computer and costs me a little bit of money. Usually, it falls within the package I pay for and we’re all OK. But on principle, it annoys me when you stick a picture (statistically, it’s probably Paul Banks or A-Rod) on your MySpace page or whatever and every time someone loads that page, guess who pays for the bandwidth? Me, yay! Usually, once I’m alerted, I change the name of the picture so the connection is no longer made and instead, one of those useless little boxes with an X in it appears on your page (I tried changing the hotlinking settings but it led to some headaches I don’t want to revisit). Sorry, but as I say in my FAQ, just copy it and drop it into Photobucket or some other hosting service and it’s all yours. I won’t mind, even if I took it with my own camera.

Except for one picture.

That’d be the one in the sidebar, which is me at some age (I don’t know, it’s not dated, although the outfit sure is). My parents worked at a summer camp and I spent every summer of my childhood there. One year, a professional photographer came up to take some candids (I think it was for a booklet advertising the camp) and captured me, dirty-handed, fresh from playing in a mud puddle. I love the unrepentant smirk on my face. There are a whole series of them in the camp archives (half have me and another kid actually in the puddle) and I guess they sent us one to keep. I suppose if it really meant all that much to me I wouldn’t display it here and so I’m resigned to other people stealing it. Still, when I saw that someone was linking to it, I had to go look. It turned out to be a French cycling forum and my picture was being used for what seemed to be a sort of game (it was the “other sports” section) of “what tennis player is this as a child?” I’m the second one. The answers haven’t been revealed but the first one looks a lot like Amelie Mauresmo.

As is my M.O., I immediately changed the name of the picture so the forum page would show the silly red X box but people who had seen it originally kept guessing anyway. One thought it was Monica Seles. Hm. Either way, it was kind of funny and since I’m learning French at the moment (maybe I’ll explain more about this later in the week) I registered and responded that it was in fact me, I don’t play tennis or really speak French, and come and have a look. At least, I think that’s what I said. Who the fuck knows.

So, welcome French pre-teen sports-enthusiasts! Please note that the little girl in the picture, sadly, did not grow up to be Monica Seles.



Depeche Mode - Photographic

 
 

Jew & A - Passover edition

Filed under : Judaism, Jew & A
On April 1, 2007
At 7:20 pm
Comments : 8

As promised, the answers to your pressing Passover queries! Sadly, there’s no suspense since the questions were in the comments. Luckily, half of you never read the comments.

Lydia asks:
Why in the world do you have to get rid of all your food? As a fat girl, that would make me extremely sad.

It makes everyone sad. And tired, very tired. Judaism is all about taking the most basic pronouncement God makes and taking it to the extreme. And why not? His pronouncements are pretty weighty. Passover celebrates the exodus of the Children of Israel from Egypt and slavery. Pharaoh kept changing his mind about it so when the Jews got the OK they dashed! Because of this, the bread they had been baking didn’t really have time to rise and instead became matzah, a kind of crispy flatbread. To commemorate this, God said we’re not supposed to eat bread on Passover and our sages have taken that to mean we must clean every speck of chametz (food that has any bread or flour involved with it) out of our homes. So unless it has a symbol on it (usually a regular Kosher symbol with a P next to it) that ensures that, out it must go. Then you clean every bit of your home (especially if you’re like me and you drink your coffee in bed each morning) to make sure nothing remains. It’s like Spring cleaning on steroids! And just when you think you’re done you find a Jolly Rancher in your messenger bag. Oops.

Here’s a good description from jewfaq.org:

The process of cleaning the home of all chametz in preparation for Pesach is an enormous task. To do it right, you must prepare for several weeks and spend several days scrubbing everything down, going over the edges of your stove and fridge with a toothpick and a Q-Tip, covering all surfaces that come in contact with food with foil or shelf-liner, etc., etc., etc.

In reality, you don’t throw everything out. There are other options:

a. Finish it up! If you lived in a home like the one in which I grew up, you ate creative recipes like pasta with cumin and ketchup from about late February onward. By the end, you’d sneak out to Baskin-Robbins for dinner just so you could avoid tuna-noodle casserole sans tuna or noodles.
b. Give it away! The homeless love Passover!
c. Sell it! No, really. Most people (Becca included) set up contracts with a friendly neighborhood non-Jew in which they sell their chametz (that’s the forbidden food) for a nominal amount and buy it back at the end of the holiday. Then you cover it up or get it out of your sight (I put mine in my storage space) and don’t mess with it till Passover has passed over.

Next year, I’ll be selling my chametz to Lydia to cheer her up.



Sarpon asks:
No Starbucks?

Actually, Starbucks’ bagged coffee often has the O-U P symbol on it. But the coffee they make in the shop does not and comes into too much contact with all the other bready goodness they sell. During the regular year, the fact that they sell ham sandwiches is pretty separate from the coffee. But on Passover, things are really strict and the bread in the sandwich is the death knell for having a latte there. But let me tell you, that is the first thing I buy for Passover each year, a bag o’Starbucks. I’m still waiting for Moses’ Pesach Blend, though.



Not a question, but Alex suggests I clarify the title of my last post. Passover is, in fact, only eight days in the diaspora (that is, outside Israel). In Israel it’s only seven, thus negating my catchy post title. This is because (and I’m going to again steal from jewfaq.org, because I still have a lot of cleaning with Q-tips and toothpicks to do):

The Jewish calendar is lunar, with each month beginning on the new moon. The new months used to be determined by observation. When the new moon was observed, the Sanhedrin [kind of like the supreme court] declared the beginning of a new month and sent out messengers to tell people when the month began. People in distant communities could not always be notified of the new moon (and therefore, of the first day of the month), so they did not know the correct day to celebrate. They knew that the old month would be either 29 or 30 days, so if they didn’t get notice of the new moon, they celebrated holidays on both possible days. This practice of celebrating an extra day was maintained as a custom even after we adopted a precise mathematical calendar, because it was the custom of our ancestors.

Since Liverpool is outside Israel, John, Paul, George, and Ringo called their song “Eight Days A Week.” Yep.



Joy Division - Passover