Magic Jewball

all signs point to no

 

Once again, Grammys reward real talent

Filed under : Music
On December 8, 2006
At 2:30 pm
Comments : 17

Did you laugh when you read that? Because I was snortling a little when I wrote it. Wait, let me get that out, ahahahahahahaha! In case you hadn’t heard, the Grammy nominations were announced yesterday and they’re as stellar as usual. You can see them all at grammy.com but take it from me, any place that recognizes the Red Hot Chili Peppers, James Blunt, and John Mayer as having the best songs and albums of the year, is a nest of crack users.

How does this happen, you ask. Well, first of all, you have to submit a whole bunch of copies of the CD to nominate it, which means pretty much only the labels do. Then they figure out who they think has the best bet and focus on that artist, thus ensuring that the rest of their artists get stiffed. Then, the people voting don’t actually get copies of the CD’s they’re voting on, so they mostly just choose the ones they’ve heard of or heard good things about. This is how dead people win all the awards, by the way. “Wow, I’ve heard of that dead guy! Poor dead guy.”

There used to be subterfuges where label people were able to vote in blocks for Grammys. See, you need to have 6 credits on a released work to vote and…well, I’d explain how it was done but I’d get fired. Needless to say, it took NARAS several years to figure it out. I would just like to declare that I always voted my conscience! Mostly.

But it’s OK, they only broadcast like 3 awards on the actual show, anyway (and there are over 100!) and no one actually watches that show. But they’ll still call it my industry’s greatest night even though there are now Latin Grammys, CMA’s, Billboard Awards, VMA’s etc.

I’m betting Corinne Bailey Rae will be this year’s India.Arie, that is, the artist about whom everyone says, “wow! they actually are recognizing real talent over there at the Grammys!” and who then wins none. But maybe not. I’ve been wrong before. Just, please God, don’t let James Blunt walk away with five awards, I couldn’t stand it. I think I’d even prefer Carrie Underwood or, God forbid, the Pussycat Dolls. Mmm hmm, music’s greatest night.

 

Starland Vocal Band – Afternoon Delight

 

17 Comments for this post

 
  1. Jane says:

    Your photo reminded me that I haven’t played Milli Vanilli for “Dance for Your Paycheck Friday” in a few months. Oh, but then there’s the Pussycat Dolls too. Tough choice.

    What was that part about talent? I got distracted.

  2. Emeraldmph says:

    Milli Vanilli was the first concert I ever went to as a tyke, with a friend of mine who was a fan… I think I gave away the shirt I bought there, which is quite the shame.

    I love seeing 11 year-olds on the bus sing Pussycat Dolls. Warms my little heart.

  3. culotte says:

    I can’t believe that Pussycat Dolls (PCD in the ‘hood) were nominated for a Grammy. Unfreakingbelievable.

    And also? John Mayer? What? James Blunt? Mr. “I Wrote the Most Annoying Song of the Year”?

    I like Corrine Bailey Rae. I hope she doesn’t get Arie’d.

  4. kay says:

    PUSSYCAT DOLLS were nominated??? For WHAT?

  5. Sarpon says:

    Thank you. Now I don’t feel so guilty for never, ever watching the Grammys. If it comes up in conversation I can say that my non-watching is a deliberate protest against the politicking and disregard for real talent. As opposed to the real reason, which is that I am completely un-hip.

  6. KP says:

    I want to vomit when I see that Justin Timberlake is nominated for all of the big awards while Tom Petty, Bob Dylan, David Gilmour and Nine Inch Nails are relegated to very specific, almost obligatory categories/awards that they will probably lose to friggin John Mayer or Snow Patrol anyway.
    And where oh where is Ray LaMontagne? The man is a revelation and he is nowhere on there. Sick I tell you. Just sick.

  7. Becca says:

    “PUSSYCAT DOLLS were nominated??? For WHAT?”

    I dunno, read the link.

    Sincerely,
    Lazy Blogger

  8. Lydia says:

    Vote for the Chicks. They’ve got talent.

  9. Sarpon says:

    Isn’t it time for a new entry? That Milli is freaking me out. Or maybe it’s Vanilli.

  10. KP says:

    Becaue I love Becca and Kay here you go:

    Pussycat Dolls were nominated for the song “Stickwitu” in the category Best Song with an intentionally misspelled title.
    (Okay it was Best Pop Performance by a Group or Duo with Vocal, but I like mine better. Keane, The Fray, Death Cab for Cutie and the Black Eyed Peas were also nominated. Stellar eh?)

  11. culotte says:

    Hey! I like Death Cab for Cutie.

  12. Becca says:

    Sorry, Sarpon, it’s been a busy week. I’ll get right on that!

    Hey! I like Keane.

  13. Celia says:

    I like that Fray song that is on the radio every 20 minutes…sad but pretty.

  14. KP says:

    The stellar remark was directed at the Pussycat Dolls. I have no problem with the others, even though that BEP song makes me itchy.

  15. Jane says:

    The only category I’m paying attention to this year is Best Contemporary Folk/Americana Album.

  16. John Masters says:

    I’m with ya on this one. All the way.

    The Grammy’s lost me in 1978, when I was but a tender lad of 15.

    That year, the Grammy for best new artist went to “A Taste Of Honey” over, The Cars, Elvis Costello, and Toto.

    Well, I can see A Taste Of Honey duking it out for last place of the four with Toto, but better than The Cars and Elvis Costello? Jeesh, I still get mad thinking about it.

    And don’t get me going on the Jethro Tull for best Heavy Metal album over Metallica.

    I say the Grammy’s have been a joke for decades. The only thing I like about them, is when someone I think is really good wins one, and it helps their career.

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